Zou ba?

(Shall we go?)

4 weeks ago, I left Colorado.

27 days ago, I met my team (minus Wes).

26 days ago, I arrived in Beijing.

25 days ago, our team was finally all together!

3 days ago, we finished our training courses, feeling like the past three weeks had been a blur.

1 day ago, we met the Harbin city team and heard their stories about the city. 

Today we had our final Beijing meal at Fanny’s (our loving name for the place across the street, run by a woman who makes excellent food and always wears her fanny pack). After dinner, we bought fruit from Dan’s friend who insisted on giving us many grapes (in addition to our apples and bananas) and tried to refuse payment. He is delightful and if ever I am in this part of Beijing again, I will buy all my fruit from him.

Tomorrow, we…

·         leave for the train station at 5am (yes, I should be in bed right now, I know),

·         meet our FAO (Foreign Affairs Official),

·         ride for many hours on a train,

·         unpack and clean,

·         shop,

·         [insert unknown evening activities that will hopefully involve food],

·         and sleep in our beds, in our new apartments.

After 5am tomorrow, I am blazing ahead into the unknown. I have been to Beijing before, I have done life in close proximity with likeminded teammates, I have spent a month in hotels in Asia, I have gone through academic courses… But I have little concept for what tomorrow looks like, much less the rest of the week, month, and year. 

But it’s here, and I’m as ready as I ever will be. Though I’m scared, I’m excited, and though I don’t really know what I’m doing, I believe what James wrote, that when I lack wisdom, I can ask my Father who gives to all generously and without reproach, and it will be given to me. I find this very comforting as I walk forward into a new job in a new city in a foreign culture. 

I AM a teacher!

Today was a big day: Microteaching.

It was not the first time I ever wrote on a white board, it was not the first lesson I have ever planned and taught in class (thanks, Rhodes), or even the first time I have stood in front of my peers with control of a class for 25 minutes (thanks, Professor Brady) … But it was the first time I have done any of these things as a teacher.

If everything goes according to “plan,” one week from tomorrow I will be teaching my first classes in Harbin. To those students, I will be the teacher. Their only English teacher. I cannot help but sit in the weight of that for a moment. I knew this when I signed up, but the reality is setting itself deeper within me: what I am doing here this year really matters.

The microteaching went really well; not only did I make it through my lesson, but I really enjoyed teaching! Reflecting back to my 12-year old thoughts about life, I can almost hear my self saying I want to be an English teacher someday because I love to read and write, and I think it’s really fun to help other people get better at English. What a blessing that that dream is now reality! Since that time, I have had (and still have) other dreams, and it has been a little difficult in the light of my present reality to hold onto the knowledge that those dreams are still good.

Those other dreams are good, and they come from the same place as the dream that led me to teach in China this year. With open hands and a humble heart I hold thoughts and hopes of grad school, Memphis (Orange Mound?), and counseling… And for now: I am an English teacher, and I am in China.

I will keep my gaze upward, and all these things will come in their proper season. I will not worry about tomorrow; for tomorrow will care for itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.

…

I do wonder, though, if it will ever stop feeling like I am playing dress up when I get ready in the mornings… I hope not J

Shall We Dance?

Tonight began much like any other night. The ‘bin team gathered in the lobby for dinner at 6, but instead of heading to a familiar spot, we wandered off the main road into: “Real China, where real Chinese people live” (Dan “the man” Moran). We joked about the implications of this ridiculous statement as we wandered down a side street. Dan let us know that if we found anything intriguing, we would eat there. The first restaurant we came to boldly advertised donkey meat. …We wandered a little farther and enjoyed bowls of noodles! Not just a bowl of noodles, a boiling hot bowl of broth with noodles (mine were potato noodles!) and many other things, i.e. seaweed strips, bean sprouts, mystery meat, boiled quail eggs, tofu, celery, and some sort of leafy green plant. We also ate meat pancakes that were a lot like quesadillas. It was delicious. All of it.

After dinner, we walked to a park, planning to play Frisbee and badminton. When we got there, there were many women in lines in the center of the park. Dancing. J Standing there watching them, I was filled with the desire to join them, as well as the memory of the time my friends and I did not dance at the Greek festival in Memphis…  

Without much hesitation, Kayla, Laura and I sidled up behind them and started learning the dance, picking it up pretty quickly. At first we felt a little out of place, but as we became more familiar with the steps and as we realized that others were joining in as well, we settled into a groove with everyone. It was so much fun – not only to be dancing, but to be dancing in a park with a bunch of Chinese women! The first dance we did reminded me of my years of ballet, and we felt lovely and graceful dancing amidst the lively chaos that filled the park. After a while, our whole team was dancing, which made it more enjoyable for us and more entertaining for the people watching us. As we danced, children ran through our lines, tiny dogs carefully avoided our feet, and all around us people were engaging in an assortment of games, exercises, and boisterous conversations.

This is what happens every night in that park. People come out of their apartments, gather in the park, and enjoy life in community with one another.

When we finally stopped dancing, there were a few people who wanted to talk to us, including some adorable children who made me want to learn Chinese and a woman who extended to us an open invitation to return and dance with them any night of the week. We will certainly be back. And we will dance with our new friends. 

Loving this Weather :)

After sleeping but a few hours last night, I was jolted awake by a flash of lightning that lit up our room through the closed curtains and the explosive clap of thunder that followed close behind. It was so startling that at first I was more confused than delighted and started to go back to sleep – but then I registered the sound of rain and was out of bed, sitting on the windowsill behind the still-closed curtain before I could even wonder what time it was. After a few minutes, my roommate, Abby, joined me briefly, but soon went to bed, leaving me to reminisce and to wonder at the power and beauty of the storm that was upon us.

Earlier that evening, before going to bed, I was blessed to talk with my best friend for the first time since I came to Beijing. It was so lovely to speak with her, sharing our hearts as we both embark on new seasons of life in unfamiliar places. One of the things that came up during our conversation was the memory of the evenings we spent watching storms from our windowsill in Spann, sipping seasonally appropriate beverages (e.g. cinnamon apple spice tea). I am so grateful to hold such fond memories– of sitting together, sharing our hearts and sitting silently together in the presence of something truly beautiful – and even thinking back on those evenings brings a deep sense of peace and joy to my heart.

It is raining again tonight and the sight out my window is one of rivers in the street, a big red umbrella pacing back and forth in the parking lot (presumably there is a human under the umbrella, but I cannot see him/her from my vantage point), people running down the street with briefcases, people walking with umbrellas, and others who seem to be enjoying the rain shower. 

As I sit again on my windowsill, happily enjoying this simple pleasure, I am missing Katy, her beautiful words, and her fabulous teacups. 

Update from Beijing!

Monday was our first full day of class; I now have a clue how to write a lesson plan! That is a good start. J In class, one of the first things they asked us was, “How many of you are teachers?” About half of us didn’t raise our hands… wrong. Apparently I need to work on internalizing the fact that: “I am the teacher!”

I have so enjoyed getting to know the people who will be with me in Harbin! All of my teammates are fun and easygoing. We are a delightfully quirky group of people, and I am looking forward to seeing how our personalities and giftings enable us to build one another up and how we will challenge one another to learn and grow. We have already spent quite a bit of time together over meals, outings, and shopping at the Wu Mart. We have eaten a lot of really tasty food (no, I haven’t liked everything, but most of what we’ve eaten has been great!) and we are trying to learn Mandarin, bit by bit.

It is difficult to find the right words to convey what this past week has been, but it has left me with a deep sense of peace and purpose about this year. I love it here, I love the people, I love that I will be teaching English, and I love Him who has called me to this place. It is lovely to be back in Asia, and I am deeply aware of what a blessing and a privilege it is to be here.